Safe and Loved

Should I draw You the picture of my heart? I hope it would be what You would love. The possession You get hold of there; and the absolute power You have ever preserved over it; leaves not the smallest space unoccupied. Oh, my Undying Love— who never misjudges the heart of Your beloved. Ever thine. Ever mine.

I'm sitting here and my thoughts are with You. Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to You. You possessed me from the beginning of my days. Before You formed me in the womb, You knew me. You have summoned me by name; You have cherished me; You have chosen me to be Your very own. Who would not love that?

I look back to everything You have done in my life, as to the days of love and innocence; and with an indescribable pleasure of being with You over the score of years roll over my soul; and with an affection heightened and sharpened by time— nor the dreary years of wondering in the smallest degree effaced from my mind. I know You've knitted me to You. You are a complete mystery to me and yet You know me better than I know myself. How can you understand me so well?  Surely my strength may fail at any time but I always find myself to end up walking into Your arms. What about completely turning away from you or walking away from You? I cannot. That would be the thing I would supremely fear to do. Because I could never imagine my life without You anymore. No matter how hurt. No matter how tested. No matter how crushed. No matter how worthless I am. I can only see myself standing before You; feeling somehow that You are holding me tight; looking into Your face and knowing that You love me too much to ever leave me. Knowing that whatever You are doing to hold me to You does not make me feel trapped or caged. Only safe and loved.

I want nothing more than to spend my life with You at my side. When I wake in the morning I want to find You there beside me. When I go to sleep at night I want to feel Your arms holding me, protecting me from the world. Though I could feel a strange combination of sadness and joy, You always end up making me smile and joyful— at You. You always end up making me understand everything by faith. You keep me as an apple of Your eye; and when I find and see myself walking into Your arms I know that I can always trust You with my life. And I am reminded again that I will always be safe with You. No reason for me to doubt Your motives for my life anymore. For I find that there is no life without You in it to share with. Nothing is too hard; nothing is impossible because of You. You make me believe that anything and everything is possible. I have all Your love; I always have. And You know what You are doing to me? You always make me love you more each day!

You have always taught me what it is to love and to be loved. Without conditions, without reservations. And I want to shout it to the world Who found me and what I've found. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful for leading me to You and for faithfully shepherding me to green pastures and quiet streams. For helping me through everything. For keeping me until the last of days. I would keep growing and getting stronger and courageous in spite of how badly I screwed it up. Thank You for loving me so unconditionally!

Have I said enough? In your presence, words will not always be necessary for you and me to communicate. Because of what we share. You always connect with conviction, with touches and in my heart. Yet I could still find I could write on and on— forever, and it is with You.